tomlinsarse: i’m about to cry my brother told me that only today he found out that LGBT stood for les/gay/bi/trans instead of lettuce green bacon tomato he looked at me and he had tears in his eyes and he said in the most horrified voice i’ve been telling people i like LGBT sandwiches okay that means i’ve been having gay sandwiches then he started to cry and ran off and yelled they all...
Rihanna: We found love in a hopeless place.
Cap: We found Steve in a frozen place.
Tony: We found Stark in an iron case.
Bruce: We found Hulk in some gamma rays.
Thor: We found Thor punching Loki's face.
Thor: And then hugging him tightly and apologizing for he is my brother, and I love him so.
Santana: Hey, I just fucked you
Santana: And this is crazy
Santana: But here's my pinky
Santana: Can sex be dating?
A cat with no legs
Anonymous asked: How does one embrace their...
quinntana-fabgay: powerlesbian: you accept the fact that there are just some ridiculous women out there whose legs just really need to be around your face Truth.
when you’re following someone for a while and everything they post is like it’s speaking to your very soul until one day they totally bash a character you love right out of the blue uninvited
James: I may have wrapped Harry in my invisibility cloak for his nap...and now I can't find him.
James: but I swear, the last time I saw him he was somewhere in the room.
This nice elderly lady came into my restaurant and...
fluorescent-swirl: So I told her our Philly steaks were the best in the county(which is true) and she had one. She called me about ten minutes after she left and was like “I TOOK ONE BITE AND THOUGHT I DIED AND WAS IN HEAVEN!” I thought it was nice she called, but then she was like “I have a saying I like to use…. THIS SANDWICH IS BETTER THAN SEX AS I REMEMBER IT” I lost it. I love people...
When people say my OTP isn't real. →